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What type of fire are you?

humor

1
0
166

George Washington University

culture

- satire

What type of fire are you?

Take our quiz if your life is already going up in flames!

Mackenzie White

4.17.17

Pick a color:

a. red
b. bright red
c. orange-red
d. a yellowy-er red
e. that cool as fuck blue color thing that fire sometimes does

What are you most likely doing on a Friday night?

a. trying to recreate a Tasty recipe
b. hitting up the club for a fun night out
c. cuddling up with your favorite book
d. light arson
e. seeing the latest superhero movie

How would your friends best describe you?

a. conceited
b. mean
c. unforgiving
d. stupid
e. ...friends?

Pick a #fire historical event

a. ???: Prometheus gives us foolish mortals the gift of fire
b. 48 BC: burning of the Library of Alexandria
c. 1666: The Great London Fire
d. 1690s: Salem Witch Trials
e. 1864: General Sherman burns Atlanta to the ground

What can't you leave the house without?

a. a small bushel of dry tinder
b. flint
c. matches
d. a still-lit torch
e. lighter


Mostly A's:

Dumpster Fire
You’re spontaneous. Because you can be shy, no one really knows what you hold on the inside, but you are a deep and complex individual, just like this fire. You can also relate to this because your life is such a mix of random garbage, you can’t even tell what started the fire, you just know that everything is going up in flames.

Mostly B's:

Car Fire
You’re adventurous. Wanderlust is your middle name and you never shy away from a new adventure. That way, when you see your life falling apart, you’re brave enough to step away. One thing you can’t walk away from is your destiny into the spiral of sadness that life has preordained you. You know you’re a walking car fire if going out with friends on a hiking trail or to the beach is your preferred hang out!

Mostly C's:

Kitchen Fire
You’re reliable. Timeliness is what you’re best known for. You have little patience for friends when they aren’t loyal to you and you aren’t afraid to speak your mind about it! But you are afraid of what kind of kitchen fire this cruel earth has in store for you.

Mostly D's:

Forest Fire
You’re humble. You’re not as naïve as people think. You love nature and all its glory. While you soak up the sun, you love to contemplate the inevitable demise of everything you love and have worked towards all your life. Plus, you’re always surrounded by pets.

Mostly E's:

Electrical Fire
You’re logical. If you identify with an electrical fire that means you’re super handy. You’re not afraid to roll up your sleeves and get to work. You occasionally freak out after not being able to handle the crippling onslaught of life, but that’s okay! It's the one thing you can't fix.